Session 5, Week 3

At exactly 9:40 Wednesday morning I took a walk through the Middle School, the Fire Studio and the Spark Studio. As I completed my walk and went back to my work, I felt euphoric. In all three studios I witnessed the same thing. Heroes choosing to be deeply engaged in meaningful work – and a vast variety of meaningful work. From geography,

to math,

to handwriting,

to 3D animation,

to ukulele,

there is nothing quite like the quiet hum of happy children in flow. Now don’t get me wrong, 1 1/2 hours later it would be sheer and absolute chaos as the Middle School and Fire Studio try to figure out putting on a play without any adults!

But that is a whole other kind of beauty.

And then in the afternoon as quest and CHOICE work cycle are in full swing, I witnessed building, creating, crazy collaboration and problem solving.

At yet, when you or I asked our children what they did at school that day, you probably got “not much” or “I don’t remember.” Yes, this is one of those times when it may be easier to be a guide than a parent at CHOICE.

In the Spark Studio communication about your child’s day may be limited. Your child may have said this week, “I made a farm today.” What we saw was your child collaborating with other heroes to come up with a plan and execute it together.

Your child may have said, “We built a neighborhood.” As guides we saw how each squad decided what to build on their “lot”. We saw the dissonance as they tried to stay within the parameters of the challenge, and we saw all the work that led to the moment it worked out!

After Tuesday’s field trip you may have heard, “I used these goggle thingys today.” We saw your child use binoculars to explore an ecosystem and the various habitats in that ecosystem. They explored a tool that may have been unfamiliar to them and figured out how to use it to enhance their discoveries.

After Thursday’s field trip when your child tells you they were screaming at the grocery store, you may think they were out of hand. We saw that they had an amazing tour with someone who knew how to channel energy and make learning fun.

“This guy came and talked to us today.” Translates to your child learning about how a building is built from start to finish and all the people and machines that make that possible.

If you heard your child say, “So-and-so said they aren’t my friend anymore.” What we may have seen is your child learning how to communicate effectively with others, making their feelings and thoughts heard, and learning how to do so in a safe, calm manner.

Each day when your child reports “I did some works” or “I read a book” or “It was fun,” we have likely seen your heroes making connections, exploring new ideas, helping one another, trying things from a different perspective, learning something new, and challenging themselves with more abstract concepts.

In the Fire Studio before Stephanie was a guide she remembers wondering, what do my kids do all week? The stories they brought home certainly didn’t paint the whole picture. The weekly blog and photos folder are a great start of understanding more. This year, heroes record their starting and ending points in core skills and heroic habits, and upload a picture of that record on Journey Tracker to discuss with their families. That can also help parents know how children are growing at school. But what being in the studio has taught Stephanie this year is that many of the heroes’ victories don’t come with a badge, a marked off check box, or even with a description at all. It is the look in a hero’s eye when they look over a page of their handwriting and know it has improved. It’s the proud chuckle of a hero who has written so much in a morning that his arm is sore. It is the strength a hero feels when he starts to get distracted and redirects himself back to his work. It is the calm a hero exudes after she and a fellow traveler have found a resolution to their disagreement. It is the smile through the tears after a hero gets help from a fellow traveler to work through a frustrating roadblock. It is the smell and feel of a studio made clean (by the heroes of course) after a chaotic day of learning and playing and making messes. It is the satisfaction of making a great point in a Socratic Discussion and seeing several heroes change their mind to your side of the discussion. And it is the bravery of holding to your opinion even when many other heroes feel differently. These moments are hard for learners to share with us parents after school, and harder to catch in a photo or checklist. But they are happening all the time in 28 unique ways all through a regular, old day in the Fire Studio.

Regarding quest you might have heard “we are working on our businesses” and doing “quest challenges.” But this week as guides we witnessed a hero that used to be very withdrawn during quest – and chose to do Core Skills during Quest- engage in a Quest work. Did they finish the work? No. But, were they open to new challenges? YES! Even though that may seem like a small thing, it’s huge!  We also noticed a hero that has previously been nervous to ask others for a Moolah when they break their contract of promises, ask for one! We saw another hero who has had a hard time finding their voice step up as a leader to lead discussions, make decisions, and delegate! These are all moments that our children may forget to share with us or not even recognize themselves.

When I asked my children what they did in Civ this week their response “We ran around and had a discussion.” What really happened for both Fire Studio and Middle School … we played a modified game of sharks and minnows with slave catchers, ferries on the Ohio River, safe houses, and runaway slaves. 

The question we discussed afterward: In real life being captured would have resulted in death or severe beatings. If you had finally arrived in Canada, free for the first time in your life, would you have considered turning back, and risking your freedom and life, to help other slaves? These are hard questions your children are grappling with.

In the Middle School our heroes are older, and we think should be able to communicate more to us what is happening, but I am not sure this is the case.

This week I sat and listened to two heroes (both of whom proclaimed at the beginning of the year, “I don’t like writing”) enthusiastically write a narrative together. Both of them had dragged their feet writing their first papers. At this point of the year, they didn’t hesitate starting for a moment and were both laughing and totally engaged in writing. It was so fun listening to them. I wanted to put their parents on face time, but not wanting to ruin the moment, I didn’t even take a picture.

I often hear parents (including myself) complain of a child’s messy room. And yes, their desks are very often just as messy. But eventually most all of them clean their desks and never once do I ask them to do it! We just get to watch in awe as they choose to do it. Fingers crossed this habit eventually makes it home!!!

Stereotypically the older children get, the less likely they are to play. I don’t know how the Middle Schoolers are at home, but at school they play a ton! It is so delightful to watch them play board games Monday mornings, outside games with the Fire Studio during Thursday grit and lots of other games in between! They are so much fun!

Monday board games
Ninja during Thursday grit
Jump roping during Thursday grit
Soccer during Thursday grit

Maybe your heroes told you we went out to the barn on Thursday, but did they tell you how anxiously engaged and focused they were in getting all their measurements for their plans? Or the genius ways they found to solve the problem of measuring high heights without a ladder?

Shoulders worked for many of the high heights.
And throwing a snowball worked for the highest heights! Genius!!

Parents probably get to hear the wrong notes on instruments, the shaky practice singing, or the frustration coming up with a good joke as your heroes get ready for the comedy night. As guides, we get to hear all that too, but also get to witness the miracle of them planning and orchestrating the whole event! Marcus didn’t make it to the full show run through on Tuesday, but the heroes didn’t really notice. Did they tell you how they just started rehearsal- with the backstage crew totally taking charge directing and pulling it all together. It was messy and there were lots of frustrations, but the heroes probably don’t realize that what they are doing is incredible! And thus we don’t get to hear about it as parents.

Afterwards we picked sticks to see who would go to “Content Kitchen” and shoot a promo video for the Comedy Night with Marcus (thank you Johnny Murdock!!!) As we walked in and got a tour of the filming studio I overheard “It’s like we’re movie stars.” The heroes were so enthralled being there and listening to the advice and energy of Marcus. Did any of you parents hear any of that? I sure hope so!!!

Hopefully your heroes told you they went to the “airplane museum.” But did they share with you the amazing stories they learned from talking with the incredible volunteers? Heroes were so excited to share with us the stories of adventure they had just heard. I hope those stories made it home to you!

If your MS hero is silent when you ask them for details of quest that day, here’s the inside scoop from this week–

We’ve started each day this session with 10-20 minutes of reading time (quest-related books or whatever they’re reading for other goals). Then we usually gather for a launch about a scientist, historical event related to space, or a dilemma that space engineers are needing to solve. They then split to the desks area to tackle individual or team challenges–currently space station and Mars habitat designs, match rockets, and aerodynamics knowledge. “Payday” comes at the end of this time to those who planned and prioritized their time and tasks, then studio maintenance and one more gathering. Most days we’ve finished the day with a scene or two from the movie October Sky, which has provoked great discussions and insights about family relationships, the space race, chasing one’s dreams, duty, and what makes a good person. Other days we finish with a game or a human pyramid! This week ended with our match rocket launches. Did your heroes share with you their excitement or their disappointment? We sure got to see it!

As I sit back and review the week, it is remarkable to me how much happens each day at CHOICE. And yet I recognize how very little is being communicated with parents. Even more important than the specific activities the heroes are engaging in is the growth and progress they are making as people. As parents, we don’t have little report cards with checked boxes for our children’s daily personal growth and progress. It can feel more fulfilling and more obvious to observe a whole bunch of small victories and baby steps from a bunch of heroes in one day than to patiently notice and wait for our own children’s baby steps and victories. With all the freedom that comes with the learning environment at CHOICE sometimes it is even hard for heroes to see the growth in themselves, let alone share it with us. They are learning to overcome the appeal of comfort, indecisiveness, and disruption. They are working so hard every day to create their ideal learning environment… and when they fail at that (which they do), they try again the next day.  As guides, we get to watch this struggle day in and day out. We watch them fail, and in the chaos of failure, with the crying, and the yelling, the blaming, and disappointment we see tiny triumphs. As these triumphs happen again and again, they may become commonplace in the heroes. So much so that we as parents and even the heroes themselves don’t notice them. Yes, there are times when it may be easier to be a guide than a parent at CHOICE. However, while we as parents continue to use the tools we have to know what is going on and continue to engage in daily and weekly purposeful conversation with our heroes, we also remember that we signed up for this. We signed up to trust our heroes with their learning. And so, we trust them and walk alongside them enjoying the journey together!